Come back later for a comprehensive report of the Schillerness of today’s Keynote.

Update: Watch the entire Keynote here.

By all indications, Phil Schiller is set to deliver an earth-shattering Macworld Keynote Tuesday morning, the likes of which have never been seen. We’re predicting complete annihilation.

We’re going to miss Phil’s typical supporting appearances, but we figure after his Keynote is done it will be pretty clear why Apple is canceling future Macworld appearances: there will be no topping this Schill-note.

Least we forget, this is not Phil’s first time hosting a Macworld Keynote. He also presented the Keynote at Macworld Paris in the summer of 2004, where he introduced the new iMac G5 with it’s new vertical all-in-one design that continues to evolve today.

Update: We aren’t the only ones predicting a massive Schiller “tour-de-force”.

Phil is on stage right now at the Apple “Let’s Rock” event demoing some games for the iPhone and iPod Touch, including the just released Spore. I guess when Phil’s not thinking about Worldwide Product Marketing and hockey he has time for a little casual gaming and biology.

Phil described MobileMe as Exchange for the rest of us, showed how events can be pushed to an iPhone, and demonstrated new web based versions of Mail, Address Book, and iCal. Additional coverage coming soon.

A closer look at Phil’s iPhone Calendar shown during the presentation also reveals that he routinely schedules time to think up new Apple rumors. Clearly there are no limits to the wizardry of his marketing strategies and even Apple fanboy bloggers are merely pawns in his game of puppetry. How’s that for a mixed-metaphor?

In reference to yesterday’s discussion of future Apple leadership, Phil once again demonstrated his competency and comfort announcing new products. No need to worry about the other guest host; Scott Forstall is only ever brought out in front of the geeky developer crowd and just doesn’t have the laugh to be the top dog. We’re all better off with him working with the smart people anyhow.

Phil’s sense of humor was sprinkled liberally throughout his piece: he cracked jokes about older generation phones in reference to BlackBerries, amongst other quips. His best joke was when he dead-panned to that everyone should just “take our word for it, it works” before actually demoing Exchange syncing. What a ham.

Obviously we think Phil is the most likely exec to inherit the throne. He’s certainly earned it and has the most MacWorld experience. Tim Cook is a wily and talented charmer, but his wizardry lies in operations and not the public persona nor product design areas. Joswiak is nothing but a yes man, Bertrand way too crazy-eyed, Ives too private. Retail Veep Ron Johnson is actually probably the best man for the job, but it might be nice to just seem them all share power post-Jobs in acknowledgement that no one man could fill those shoes. I don’t think any outsiders would stand a chance at the top in a company like this one.

The only gift I have to give back for the divine and eternal gift of conception, creation, and birthing bestowed upon this website is this link to the finest piece of CARS merchandise available: the
Schillermania Roadie T-shirt. I only hope that the untold thousands of dollars in profit generated by this generous link placement will not lure old Moldy-Moltzy back to quirky internet publishing. May Schillerworld live on forever.

The picture was taken by John Gruber, who did not in any way authorize it’s use here nor has he been contacted. Click through to view the actual photo at Flickr. Apologies for the unethical and illegal usage.

John was 49 years old.

“It’s not just about Intel Inside. When you buy any off the shelf PCs, the boxes are covered with confusing logos, and messages, and icons. You open it up: there’s stickers to peel off displays and keyboards; they’re all over the place. And then you start it up and you find junkware all over your desktop and in your menus that they’ve littered with it trying to up sell you on junk and that whole philosphy: we try to just give you a great product that you’ll love and you don’t have to peel stuff off to make it look better.”

Link to audio of the question and answer on MacWorld.

Also, breaking up to the minute coverage at CARS of course: Crazy Apple Rumors covers Fake Phil Blog

Schiller University is real!

Google Ads are pretty amazing I guess. Who knew that such a place even existed, but there is was advertised right on the side of the page there. I’m stunned.

More on this soon.